Hi Mark S.,
How old are you now? I ask only because people of different ages
often frequent different types of places. When I think of how I met
all the guys I had some sort of romantic relationship with, each time
it was actually a coincidental meeting, usually through a friend. I
don't recommend bars for obvious reasons.
Do things that interest you AND that you do with other people. For
example, you might enjoy looking at stars from your own back yard,
but you are far more likely to meet someone at a club for stargazing
or at a night at an observatory, for example. And my theory is, even
if you don't meet a special someone, you've gotten to meet people
with common interests and hopefully enjoyed whatever activity you
chose to attend.
From a woman's perspective, meeting for lunch or coffee is the
"safest" in terms of doing something with someone you don't really
know, so that might be a good suggestion. Say something like, "You
know, I've really enjoyed talking with you. Would you like to meet
for coffee (or lunch) sometime this week (or next)?" That's a foot in
the door. Then you can talk more and see if there is any mutual
interest. And friends are not bad things, so if it doesn't go
anywhere past a friendship, at least you will have another friend.
I'm trying to think of things that kind of turn people off......
Here's a few... people who are too clingy or needy, people who have
been abducted by space aliens:), people who talk about themselves
constantly, people who ask very personal questions or share very
personal things too soon in a relationship. I'm sure there are
others, but you get the gist. Ask about the other person, what things
they like to do, music they enjoy, what they do for a living etc.
Share the same kinds of things about yourself. Most people enjoy a
good sense of humor, but sometimes humor is a very personal thing, so
that can be tricky some times. Like my husband and I have shared a
very dark sense of humor at times, and other people might find the
things we joked about shocking or at least not very funny.
My best wishes to you. Life is always better when it can be shared
with friends or loved ones.
Tammy
Megan's Mom
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