--- In epilepsy@yahoogroup
>
> Marc, how about model building? They have scale ships, cars, and
> other things, too. It sounds like you are a person with strong
> attention to detail, so you'd be quite good at this. The kits vary in
> price, but none of them are really expensive. Another idea is
> building a doll house. The initial cash outlay is probably more for
> this, but you can sell the doll house when you are finished. These
> can be quite detailed, as much as you want to put into it.
>
It's funny you mention this. In the last two years of his life, my Dad was into model building, but I become very frustrated. It wouldn't work for me.
> I also find that digging in the dirt, growing things, brings peace to
> me. It kind of puts me in a zone where I have no real sense of
> passing time and am just one with what I'm doing.
This past year was the first year during which I haven't grown tomatoes on my balcony. It was because of my seizures. I hope to start up again next year, but that's a LONG way off. :(
Mark
Some crafts do the
> same thing, such as painting, working with clay and even the model
> building I mentioned above.
>
> You didn't ask, but as the mother type, I'll tell you anyways. For
> your own sake, you need to retrain the way you think. We all have
> self-talk, the voices in our brains. Most peoples' is somewhat
> critical, pointing out their own mistakes, screw-ups, but yours seems
> extremely negative. You need to retrain yourself so that when those
> angry thoughts about what you can't do come into your mind, you need
> to counter them. You can do this both by calling to me all of the
> many things you still CAN do and by reminding yourself that you are
> overblowing the importance of that one thing. Whether or not you can
> drive, for example, is certainly inconvenient, but it isn't a life-
> ending catastrophe either.
>
> For myself, I've also found that developing my sense of gratitude
> also helps keep the negatives at bay. (I don't have epilepsy, but
> have chronic depression and fibromyalgia, both of which I take meds
> to help.) Whenever my kids used to say, "Life isn't fair," I would
> reply, "Of course it isn't. If it was, you wouldn't have it nearly so
> good." Most of us on this list have a place to live, enough food to
> keep us going, heat in the winter, AC in the summer, at least a few
> people in our lives who care about us, clothes and belongings that
> enrich our lives, clean water, a free public education (yeah, the
> quality varies a LOT), medical care, and no warfare in our front
> hards. There are literally millions of people in the world who don't
> have these things.
>
> I am not currently doing it, but I used to keep a gratitude journal.
> Just take any notebook, and each and every day write down a minimum
> of three things that you were grateful for that day. They may be
> pretty small some days, I'll grant you:) But Megan has seizures, and
> we're grateful if she doesn't hurt herself when she falls during a
> seizure, for example. Her boyfriend has been driving my car and got
> into two fender benders. I was grateful no one was hurt. And then
> there are the many positives in our lives that are just too easy to
> overlook, and we often do overlook them. The leaves on a maple in
> autumn, a smile from someone you meet on the street, the kind person
> who stops to help you when you need directions or drop something...
> I could go on and on, but you get the idea.
>
> I'm sorry if this comes across as preachy. I'm a person who has a
> pretty good outlook on life, but that negative self-talk can really
> get you down. Hugs and my best wishes to you.
>
> Tammy
> Megan's Mom
>
> PS What you are doing with the scratching of yourself until you bleed
> sounds very similar to cutting, which is something a lot of teens are
> doing right now. I've known a few kids who were cutters, and they say
> that it's a release for them, lets out their bad feelings. It's
> definitely not the best coping mechanism, though. Are you still
> seeing a counselor? Do talk with him or her about this. I don't have
> any good advice on other things you can do instead of the self-
> mutilation that are more constructive, but I'm sure your counselor will.
>
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